Overall I think this decision to go back will bring me the most happiness. I feel that if I denied the job offer and basically another chance to go back to Japan I would of deeply and greatly regretted it. I know once I decide to come back to America (assuming I want to after my nine months there) I will have to start looking for a job again, but right now the job market sucks and I don't see myself enjoying any job I could get here. I feel teaching (especially kids) is more suitable to my personality. Being cooped up all summer in a cubicle just isn't my style. If I can go to a place completely alone, get a fresh start and meet new people in a foreign country and just enjoy life what would stop me from doing the same in America or for that matter anywhere? This trip will significantly boost my confidence to take on the world.
America can be a good place too. There certainly are great areas, and great communities. I feel in Japan I will get the sense of community I really want in America. Being respected and contributing person in a community is something I feel is very important and we have somewhat lost in some communities in America.
Japan is a wonderful place and even though my experience in Sano (the city I will be living) will be entirely different than my previous experience in Tokyo, I can almost guarantee I will have some of the best memories and times of my life.
This will be the first time I will be on my own for both my birthday, Christmas and New Years, but I think by December I'll have some really good friends, and a great community in Japan that will be happy to have me as company in their homes.
On a side note I figure if I plan on learning more Japanese I'd say Japan is a good place to start.
In other news for some strange reason I keep thinking about this: To me it's weird that after great moments or turning points in our lives have past the only somewhat tangible things we have are our memories. (That can be somewhat depressing but it depends on how you look at it).
I've been listening to this song called Yellow Moon by Akeboshi. I like it, and in Japanese I suppose it makes sense but the English translation comes out as follows
Romaji
Kinou wa call sign,
Zenbu, keitai de
Norenai fuzz guitar
Hen na kouen de
Muchuu de motor bike,
Kaze wo oikoshite
Mikazuki wa hisuterii,
Boku no ue de
Chikyuu wa goorurain,
Inu mo raion mo
Kasei ni moving on.
Nanka mendou de
English
All day yesterday
My cellphone’s call signal kept going off
An out-of-tune fuzz guitar
In a strange park
On my motorbike, oblivious
Overtaking the wind
The crescent moon is history
Above me
The earth is my goal line
The dogs and the lions
Are all moving on to Venus
It’s kind of annoying
